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I
knew nothing.
I did not know what to seek,
I did not know where to go.
Whom was I to ask, where was I to wander?
What path to follow?
What instructions to pursue whereby I might find my Beloved?
Seeking Him I reached the mosque,
But all I found were vain discussions on sacraments and ceremonials.
My heart told me to go to a seminary;
Maybe there I might meet my Lord.
But all I met there were noisy debates and scholars puffed with eloquence.
I was advised to go visit the temple.
I found nothing there but idols being worshiped and gongs being sounded.
Disgusted, I sought a stone to strike against my head.
For nowhere could I find that callous Beloved of mine.
Then I went on a pilgrimage to all the holy sights.
Maybe I would find Him there.
So I stopped at many holy places and bowed before many deities,
But it brought me no comfort.
And when I found myself helpless I left the towns and its temples to wander in the jungle.
In the wilderness I wept and shed hot tears.
I asked myself, "How long must I bear this agony of separation?"
But there was nowhere to go, no place to find shelter from my pain.
For days I roamed in the forest a poor man, a pilgrim, a homeless fakir
In the mountains too, I struggled.
I was empty, hungry~ thirsty-in a miserable plight, without a morsel to appease my hunger, without a drop to quench my thirst.
I laid myself out in a field, the burning sun was overhead.
My mind filled with the desire to see Him
But all was in vain-
The Lord would not show Himself to me.
I shed tears of blood that sparkled like rubies in the sands.
When I reached a state of total despair, hoping that death might rescue me from this pain, He, my careless Beloved,
Came to me.
Like a mother rushing to her sick child,
He came to me, sat by my side, and placed my head upon His lap.
Kind words came from His lips:
"Now see whatever you want to see,
I will reveal to you all the secrets of my heart.
Remember, first We test our lover.
We torment him, oppress him, and force him to shed tears.
Then We bring him to us.
When all his thoughts are of the Beloved,
We allow him to come near, shower him with grace, and hold him in our arms.
Thus he becomes perfect."
As these words reached my ears
I came back to life, gained consciousness, and was free of all pain.
Then I cast one look at His radiant face
And the mystery of all creation lay bare before me.
In one moment the good and bad actions of lifetimes vanished.
From separation I passed into Unity;
All the illusions of life disappeared like a phantom show.
Now, wherever I cast my glance, I see Him and none other. The Muslim, the Hindu, and the Jew Have all become the same to me they have all merged in the Glory of my one Beloved.
So says Nazir.
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